When Jesus was confronted with his friend Lazarus’s death, he was emotionally overcome. We are told that “Jesus wept”. This is the
only place in the Gospel where we are told Jesus weeps. We are, in this verse, presented with Jesus, who is like us, who feels the grief and pain of the death of a loved one.
Jesus knew that he was going to raise Lazarus. Yet, despite this, he feels the loss of death. The strongest man or woman is the one who feels compassion for others and is not afraid to show that compassion.
We live in an era where grieving and weeping are still seen as a sign of weakness. Even if we do not consider it a weakness, we feel uncomfortable when someone around us cries. We might be tempted to say things like “do not weep; everything will be ok”. Sometimes reactions are not well thought through because, from an
early age, we have been taught an “appropriate” or even automatic response to facing our – and others’ – grief and pain. Think of children who are told: “Don’t cry! Only babies cry!” There is an underlying message in that kind of response. Children are led to believe that it is not ok to show emotion, that somehow doing so is diminishing and not a sign of maturity.
There is something about life’s pain we want to try and escape or, at best, help others escape. But, the truth is, Jesus realises that the best response we can make is to feel pain – that of ours and others – and weep. In other words, let the emotion
flow.
Notice how some of the crowd respond. They say: “See how he loved him!” They recognised this in Jesus’ tears, his grief and also saw how he was
being empathetic with the two sisters, Mary and Martha. One might see their response as affirmation that Jesus’ weeping showed his emotion and great compassion.
Today
it might be helpful to reflect on how you feel about showing others – in an appropriate manner – how you feel. For example, are you able to express emotion, to weep? How do you deal with the feelings of others, especially those who weep when they are with you?
