We may begin to ask ourselves, why does the Lord allow us to experience desolation? Why do we
have to deal with these weeds growing in our hearts among the wheat?
St. Ignatius offers counsel on this as well.
There are several reasons why we may experience desolation.
One reason is that we may have grown lazy and lukewarm in
our following of God. Sometimes we wonder why we no longer feel God’s guidance in our lives but forget that we have stopped making time for prayer, that we have stopped paying attention during our prayer, or that our intentions have begun to stray.
Sometimes desolation comes as a test. It can be tempting to follow and serve God because it feels good to do so. We may begin following this good feeling rather than the God who grants this good feeling. Are we able to follow God even when we feel anxious, frustrated and disrupted?
Another reason why we experience desolation is to wake us up to the reality that we depend entirely on God. Desolation helps us to recognise that consolation, joy, peace, and love are all gifts
from God. We oursleves cannotcreate consolation, it is a gift given to us by God. When we are in desolation, we may relaise the gift that consolation was. Basically, desolation can bring us some much-needed humility when we have begun to think that all the good we do and experience is the fruit of our own efforts.
The most important thing to remember in times of desolation is that even though we may not feel consolation, God always grants us every gift we need for our spiritual survival. God never leaves us, even when he makes his presence more difficult to perceive. To become aware of
this may be the dearest fruit of desolation.
Consider why it is that you are experiencing desolation. Have you grown lukewarm and
cold in your relationship with God? Have you begun to depend on the nice feelings of consolation? Do you think the good you do and experience is your own making?
Reflections by Sean van Staden SJ
